Thursday, January 8, 2015

A Challenge

A Challenge

Last night in Wednesday Night Live, I took a leap of faith (of sorts) by sharing with my students that 2014 was a particularly difficult year for me in terms of my faith because of doubts that seemed to resurface often and assail what had been to that point an unchallenged belief in God's existence and the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Some might find such a confession to be unwise, but I feel like it was actually the scriptural thing to do. Indeed, a hallmark of incarnational ministry - especially to teens - is living one's life with the highest level of vulnerability and honesty because these qualities help those being led to trust and identify with their leader and understand that, like them, he is flesh and blood, quite imperfect and has to wade through the same mires and wildernesses that they do - maybe even more. Additionally, a consistent indictment against the Church (and one that is quite justified) is that Christians mask their doubts/struggles with smiles and "positive thinking" rather than actually dealing with them in the context of their belief. I don't want that quality to characterize the Branch. To me, that isn't faith; it's fear. Christians should not be satisfied with a life devoid of the divine experience. In fact, lack of experiencing God produces a lack of faith, which makes one wonder exactly what people who lack the divine experience actually believe in (Pascal's Wager just won't do!). Saint Augustine himself said, "Faith is to believe what you do not see; the reward of this faith is to see what you believe." Scripture is brimming with exhortations to know, experience and love the living God - a real, live person. These verbs strongly indicate that faith is an act that begets reciprocity, and to live/think any other way is to fall short of a standard for experiencing God that the Bible itself establishes.

So on to the challenge. In the wake of these frequent moments when I've struggled with resurfacing doubts, I've found it helpful to recall past moments where I felt like I had a particularly strong experience or encounter that adequately displayed not only God's existence, but His love toward me. Consequently, these moments confirmed what I believed to be true about God. So how is it then that, after my faith has been confirmed by these powerful moments, doubt resurfaces? I think that that can honestly be chalked up to a very human tendency to live life so presently that we forget to think on those past moments that have made us who we are - good or bad. But isn't it interesting that it's much easier to be defined by negative past events, but forget positive ones? I digress. What has become increasingly clear to me now is that, in light of my forgetfulness, I should begin recording moments when I've had a particularly powerful instance of the divine experience. And then, when the days of doubt come, I can refer back to those moments and perhaps reflect more sharply on why I believe (and whether I still should).

My challenge to you, then, is two-fold:

1) Begin to journal down or record somehow the moments in which you've experienced God in a particularly powerful way, especially if they seem to be beyond coincidence or reproach (though this isn't always possible). Then, when you go through a rough patch that really tests your faith, read what you recorded and reflect on why you believe what you believe.

2) Share. I mean that specifically and generally. Specifically, I'd love it if you shared a story right here on this blog post in the comments section. But in general, we strengthen and encourage each others faith whenever we share our testimonies. So perhaps we should learn to cultivate the practice of sharing with others stories in which we've had a particularly meaningful instance of the divine experience.

Grace & Peace

sray